Saturday, September 12, 2015

I'm Not Your Baby

There are times when I truly feel that my peculiar dislikes will leave me single forever.  I don't know what to say.  I can't help it.  There are just some things that make me feel uncomfortable and I really can't change that.  Amongst those things that drive me crazy are when guys call me a pet name prematurely.

I remembered that I wrote about the pet name thing before.  If you want to see it click here.  But it wasn't until a few days ago that I really thought about the underlying reason why I hate pet names.  Sure I don't like feeling patronized.  The ultimate black feminist in me doesn't want to be considered as an object or a little girl.  But this week I realized that there as something much deeper that bothered me.

My friend reminded me of something that one of my ex-boyfriends said while we were dating.  He was telling me a story about how one of his friends as caught calling a woman who he was dating by the wrong name.  His advice to this friends as to call every woman baby so that he never got their names mixed up.  My girlfriend shared a similar story with me that the guy who she as dating, who she found out had a girlfriend, also referred to all his female companions as baby.

The reason why I don't want to be called baby or sweetie or sweetheart or anything similar, it just doesn't feel special.  Pet names are supposed to be for someone you care about.  Someone with whom you have a connection.  When I am online dating nothing makes me feel more turned off than when a guy that I have never met all of a sudden thinks it is ok to use terms of endearment.  It to me is the same as saying I love you.  Would you say I love you to a stranger?  Of course not, unless they just gave you a million dollars! lol

So there it is. Crazy or not.  I might be too picky.  But I just want to know that I am really special.  I don't want don't want to be just one of your babies.

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