Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Mom and Me

year marks the 20th anniversary of my mom's diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis.  Since her diagnosis and in particular the past few years I have really gotten to know my mother in a way that I had never imagined.  The mom I know and love today is the complete opposite of who she was 20 years ago.  In many instances I am grateful that she is different and does not remember who she used to be.

As I was preparing to write this post I realized that I have talked about my mom A LOT.  Here are a few examples:  Preparing for the Inevitable, Note From Mom, Normal LifeHonor Thy Mother.  I noticed a theme within these posts,  that most of the time I was complaining or frustrated.  Now, don't get my wrong, I am not going to apologize for it.  This blog is about openness and honesty.  Being a caregiver is a big responsibility.  Being a caregiver at an early age is also a unique circumstance.

Despite all of my complaints and frustrations, as I look back I am realizing that my mom is pretty awesome.  In many ways my mom teaches me how to be the type of person who I want to be.  I think sometimes I am moving so fast that despite her deficiencies that she is not a hindrance in my life, she is actually invaluable.

My mom is probably one of the most caring people I know.  She loves to give people cards.  I hate cards so I have not adopted this practice of hers.  But she is always right there with a card for someone for any occasion.  Whether it is a birthday two months in advance, Christmas, St. Patrick's Day, a friend's daughter, or even just once in awhile a card to encourage me through my struggles my mom is there with card in tow.  She teaches me a lesson that sometimes I think I am giving a lot of myself, but maybe I am not really giving very much at all.

Mom also is a fan of giving gifts.  Despite having a very limited income mom always manages to give gifts to friends and family.  A lot of the time I don't know where she gets the money for the gift, where it is coming from, or where she bought it from, but she never fails to celebrate a birthday.

She is very outgoing and friendly.  She always asks my friend how her son is doing.  Which says a lot that she remembers that she even has a son.  Much to my dismay she is constantly striking up conversations with strangers.  And whenever we are out around town she always runs into at least one person she knows who is so excited to see her (despite the fact that she might not remember who they are).  Now this, I know I have definitely inherited from her.  So I guess I understand how my friends feel when I strike up random questions lol.  She is also very funny, although sometimes I don't know if she means to be...

Most importantly, my mom loves me.  She loves me even when I am not at my best.  And she tells me she loves me.  This is huge.  I did not grow up in a family where we said I love you a lot.  We did not hug and kiss each other.  But now, with her MS she always expresses her love.  Sometimes she watches me when I am asleep, or she just wakes me up to ask if I am ok, both of which are creepy but I know that she is coming from a good place.  I know she is not doing this to annoy me, but because she loves me.

So yeah despite her flaws my mom is pretty awesome!  And if you know her you will agree to.

Mom and I will be walking in the MS Walk on April 26th!  Well correction, I will be walking, mom will be pushed in a wheelchair.  If you would like to donate to me or our team, Team Bonbon please go Donate to MS Walk 2014

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