I don't think it is by coincidence that I had the urge to write about this topic today. In fact, it was just this weekend when I was telling one of my friends of my efforts to change my thoughts. But today, God sent me a reaffirmation of this practice.
All this month I have been reading the book I Declare: 31 Promises to Speak Over Your Life written by Joel Osteen. My friend gave me this book a few months ago, but I just started it reading it at the beginning of the month. This book is a powerful tool. In fact, some of the declarations speak so strongly to my journey right now that I feel like this book was placed in my possession only through God's wisdom. Today's declaration is to "have a sound mind filled with good thoughts, not thoughts of defeat." And boy is this a struggle.
A few days ago a friend was checking up on me to see how I was doing. I told her that I was feeling good and that God was really making some changes in my life and that I felt like I was about to start a new phase. She told me that she was happy for me, but to be on the look out. That the devil tries to block from receiving our blessings and tries to keep our eyes off of God. I listened to her warning, but at the same time I was thinking I have been through enough I can take anything. That same day I found out that I did not get the job that I had interviewed for. I was a little disappointed, maybe even a little sad, but definitely not defeated.
Yesterday I took my car in only to get a break light fixed. I casually asked them to look at the breaks because there was some squeaking. The estimate came back for over $1400 worth of repairs. I was sad. But I also very calm. And again I was not defeated. Over my the course of my life, money, or shall I say lack of money, has been an issue for me for quite sometime. Even before I became unemployed money was still an issue. However, I am used to this and I realize that I can only do what is in my power. The me from a few weeks ago might not have handled everything so well. I can only thank God for that.
Financial issues aside, there have been a lot of issues that I have been dealing with the last few months that require me to reprogram my thoughts. I have been dealing with how others see me and how I see the world. I have analyzed how I am as a person, who my friends are, and how friendships work. I have questioned what I am bringing into the world and how I fit in. At times I have definitely had some stinking thinking. But I think the difference is that I can recognize it and really work and pray to change those thoughts. It is not easy. No it is very difficult to make a conscience effort to change your thoughts.
Over the past few weeks I have gone through this whole uncomfortable feeling of change. However, at the same time I have also experienced some peace as well. I can only think it is partially from working to reprogram my thoughts. I encourage everyone to give it a try, it might just change your life.